“I allowed four of my children to die through abortion, Sydna,” the caller outlined through tears. “I am a serial killer who deserves prison!”
When God makes the reality of abortion obvious to a post-abortive soul, many feel they deserve incarceration – even the death penalty. Sadly, the worst prisons can be in our own minds.
After abortion, self-condemnation and shame can mirror a solitary confinement existence. To open that internal prison door to receive God’s grace and mercy seems frightful and wrong, particularly after multiple abortions. Many simply believe God’s forgiveness isn’t possible and live their lives chained to this pain.
According to the National Library of Medicine, based on The Guttmacher Institute analysis of 8,380 non-hospital abortion patients, as many as half of women entering abortion clinics have previously experienced abortion. Abortion can become habitual in a woman’s life, much like any other sin. Age was the strongest factor in repeat abortions. Those over 30 had more than twice the odds of a prior abortion compared with 20–24-year-olds.
Other factors linked to higher likelihood included having children, being Black, using insurance/financial assistance, and recent disruptive life events. A college degree and living 25+ miles from the clinic were linked to lower likelihood. Age is the biggest risk factor—simply living longer increases the window for unintended pregnancy. Some associated characteristics are outside individual control.[i]
When a life event hit the heart of this caller – the death of a beloved family member – her abortion grief was ignited. Up until that point, she was pro-choice and seemingly endured no obvious emotional regret.
Since this caller’s family member was now with her four children in heaven, her abortions sins were revealed to that person at last. That was the stimulus for God’s conviction. It is difficult to stop the flow of God’s conviction once it begins. Thankfully, God put me in her path. She attended an abortion recovery program that provided miraculous healing and restoration for her soul.
The first night of my own abortion recovery class featured my leader confessing to three abortions. I mentally rejected her, wondering how anyone could have done this three times. Then I felt the strong conviction of God with a clear message to my heart – “If you can do this once, you can do it many times. Do not judge!”
But for the grace of God, I could have chosen abortion again. Over the last 35 years of ministry, I have heard thousands of multiple abortion testimonies. From those discussions, here are eight common scenarios that I’ve encountered that have impacted these women’s decisions to abort repeatedly:
Atonement/Replacement Child – After abortion, many instantly realize they’ve lost someone very special. They can then work to get pregnant again to “replace” that loss. If her support system is the same as before, the mother often faces disgust and a refusal of support. She can then be bullied and mocked until she ends the subsequent wanted pregnancy.
Abortion Ratification – Many become overtly pro-choice after abortion, working to convince themselves that they made a good choice in aborting. Logically, they will choose it again to prove to themselves it was a good decision. Until conviction arrives, they can abort repeatedly, growing colder with each procedure.
Fallout Behavior – Abortion often ignites promiscuity, drug and alcohol abuse to offset regret. Should another pregnancy result, abortion will be their “go-to” option.
Partner Abuse – Abused women often have no choice in subsequent pregnancies. Abusers can wound them until they agree to abort. Not wanting their children to endure a life of abuse, these mothers falsely believe they are protecting their child from a violent upbringing by sending them back to heaven. Few understand that abortion is the ultimate form of child abuse.
Sexual Abuse – Before abortion was legalized in 1973, pregnancy in a very young woman revealed a predator’s touch. Then abortion gave pedophiles a tool to protect themselves. These abusers often monitor the cycles of their youthful victims. If a period is missed, an abortion clinic is the next stop. These abusers can then continue their cycle of sexual torment unimpeded.
PTSD Impact – Many multiple post-abortive people have experienced numerous incidents of adverse childhood experiences. Repeated PTSD encounters can lead to a state of emotional callousness where even a late-term abortion is no big deal. These are the women that taunt pro-lifers and sidewalk counselors in defending even late-term abortion at a vulgar level.
Family History – Unexpected pregnancy can be repeated over the generations of a family. Without God’s intervention, post-abortive parents push children and even grandchildren to abort by refusing to support an unexpected pregnancy.
Abortion Anesthesia – I was barely able to afford an abortion, let alone pay for anesthesia. Consequently, my abortion was a horrific experience of pain and suffering. My body and soul were broken as I departed that clinic. I vowed to never put myself in such a position again by becoming obsessive with contraceptive use. When women are put to sleep for their abortions, their trauma is minimized. These women are more likely to abort again.
There are thousands of other reasons for multiple abortion experiences. Thankfully, there is no sin that God cannot forgive and use for His glory! If you are in this spot of pain, HerChoicetoHeal.com is here to help you discover God’s healing.
If you are angry with those who aborted more than once, Luke 6:36-38 outlines God’s perspective – Therefore be merciful, just as your Father also is merciful. “Judge not, and you shall not be judged. Condemn not, and you shall not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven. Give, and it will be given to you: good measure, pressed down, shaken together, and running over will be put into your bosom. For with the same measure that you use, it will be measured back to you.”
[i] Jones RK, Jerman J, Ingerick M. Which Abortion Patients Have Had a Prior Abortion? Findings from the 2014 U.S. Abortion Patient Survey. J Womens Health. 2018;27(1):58-63. (Guttmacher Institute analysis of 8,380 non-hospital abortion patients).
